Andy Powell has revealed the true reason behind his retirement from rugby was the effects of depression.
The 35-year-old announced his retirement earlier this week, citing a recurring knee injury, but believes he has taken a positive step by revealing the actual circumstances.
“The last year has been difficult,” said Powell, in an interview with Sky Sports. “I’ve been suffering a bit with depression. I gave a statement the other day saying it was my knee, but it wasn’t.
“I’ve been thinking in the back of my mind for a long time, ‘am I going to do it now?’ It was tough but I’ve made the decision and it’s a lot of weight off my shoulders, which I feel a lot better for.
“I’ve been dealing with it for around 18 months. It’s been tough, family problems and knowing when to call time on your career. It’s done now and it does feel a lot better.”
Powell, who won 23 caps for Wales and toured with the 2009 British and Irish Lions, found himself falling out of love with rugby in recent years after a long career in the sport.
He added: “I started playing professionally when I was 17 and I’m 35 now. That’s a long time in the game and your body takes a lot of beating. It was breaking me mentally as well.”
Two days after World Mental Health Day, Powell decided to speak out and seek support.
“I’m quite a strong character, I’ve got a lot of pride so it’s hard for me to come out and speak about it,” he said.
“I’m a bit of a macho man on the pitch but everyone’s got their soft side and for me to speak out is a massive thing.”
With the support of his family, Powell is excited about the future and looking forward to moving onto the next chapter in his life.
“My mum has been there for my whole career. If it wasn’t for her, I probably wouldn’t have done what I’ve done,” he said.
“I’m getting through it. I see a light at the end of the tunnel, which is great.”
On Tuesday, Powell’s current club, Merthyr, has announced that their player was calling it a day because of injury.
Chairman Peter Morgan had said: “I bring sad news our former Captain Andy Powell has decided to hang up his boots. He has found it hard to get over his current knee injury.
“Andy will not be forgotten. He was a big part of our success in winning the Championship and the first player as captain to take us to the Premiership.
“Andy had plenty of time for everyone he will be sadly missed on the field and off, but will always be welcome to our club.”